Friday, March 23, 2007

13 is such a tough age to be. i remember. zits. clothes that don't fit. hormones goin' crazy. you're not a child but not an adult either. you want hugged and kissed but are embarrassed to be hugged and kissed. kids at school are mean. boys are gross and stupid but you're beginning to like those gross and stupid boys. but they don't like you back. they say you're weird. at least they did to me : )
Lauren is 13. 13 is a tough age to be.

Yesterday, was one of the most heartwarming days of my life. Lauren has been going through a little bit of a rough time, being thirteen. She went to a Christian school since pre-school, and this is her first year in public school. Public school is tough. The kids are tough. Lauren is soft. She is so sweet and kind and loving. She has God in her heart, and doesn't understand why kids are mean, and why they swear and say bad things. She's never been in an environment like that before.
I felt as though Lauren needed some one on one time with me,and also, she needed something to make her feel good. So a few days ago I told her that we were going shopping to buy some new clothes and shoes, and go out to dinner...just Lauren and me.
You have to know Lauren, but she's not a shopper. She hates shopping. She doesn't like clothes. They are only a necessity to her, definitely not something pleasurable. Trying them on, for her is torture. But she desperately needed new clothes.
I picked her up from school and off we went.
She was hard at first...grumpy..whining..but I began to talk to her. I began to tell her how beautiful she was, how special she was, what an AMAZING daughter and child of God she was. As I showered her with love, my love and God's love, she began to soften. She'd say, "oh mom..quit saying that." But it was the same as the hugs and kisses, they say stop, but inside they beg for it..Oh they need to hear it constantly. Over and over again, children need reassurance.
I asked her about her dreams. I asked her what she thinks about before she falls asleep. I asked her to tell me what she feels inside of her heart. What does she want to be when she grows up. She opened her heart up to me..We talked and dreamed together..
We sang silly songs at the top of our lungs, while listening to the radio. We ate pizza and salad and brownie desserts for dinner. We played video games. We found the PERFECT CLOTHES, that fit beautifully! We found a purse that she loved. We found shoes she adored. We held hands as we walked through the mall together. We took pictures of ourselves making funny faces. We hugged. We laughed... a lot. We re-connected. It was one of those moments in time, when everything was just right with the world.
I will remember this day for the rest of my life. Mother and daughter. I felt her grow up that afternoon. I got to know her as a woman, instead of just as a child. I like the woman she is becoming. She is a sweet and kind and loving young woman. This post is dedicated to you Lauren Elizabeth. I love you my beautiful daughter.

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